Naglalaslas ang mga Pala-laslas

I’ve been through the temptation so I knida know what makes one want or need to retreat to the seemingly illogical and unreasonable act of self-destruction.

Why'd one get drawn to succumb with this sober state?  Why would a person take a sharp object and bloodwrite names and phrases on skin?

1.    “I’d rather feel physical pain than emotional hurt.”

Ibabalin ko ang atensyon ko sa sugat na gagawin ko at makakalimutan ko ang problema ko.

I propose the acquiring of a will to face the struggles we’re in.  After the scarring, we’d still have to face the problem anyway.  The “comfort” it “may” give is temporary – an extension of it is when someone notices the wound and offers you help out of pity or share the hurt; masasaktan siya kasi importante ka sa kanya.  Do you like other people to hurt because of you?

Ok so you wanna scar yourself para mabalin ang sakit.  Little may you realize at the moment na baka each time na Makita mo ang scar, you’ll feel the same pain – and what would you do para mabalin ang sakit?  More scars? 

Kung ganito lang naman ang reason, bumili ka ng haplas, ilipat sa empty bottle ng eye droplets and yeah physical pain.

2.    “I’m tellin’ you how important you are to me.”

Sa sobrang pagmamahal ko sa’yo, I’ll scar my skin with your name.

Papatayin mo sa guilt ang taong may-ari ng pangalan.

It’s a sign of being desperate na i-keep ang person.  It only gives you pity back and not love.  Mas may atensyon na mapupunta sa pain mo at di sa passion mo for happiness with the person. 

Even if you’re trying to prove with it that you can “hurt for”, the guarantee is lame.  The real guarantee is kung kaya mo pa siyang mahalin at samahang magshopping sa mall after niya makarecover sa aksidenteng nag-result ng pagbabaliktad ng kanyang ilong at pag-lipat ng ari niya sa kanyang noo.

3.    “I’m dead to you.”

I’ll bleed to let them know I exist and I’m in unconscious need of their attention.

Easier said than done man but I’d say it would help if we focus sa pagpupuno ng kung anumang kulang sa relationship rather than basking on the seemingly hopeless situation – which is kinda selfish.

Always remember that somewhere, someone is experiencing, if not the same thing, a worse case.

Remember them who have been raped but still flourished.

Everything that happens to us is a point of growing.  And hey, attention lang naman ang “wala pa”, or encouragement or whatever – there’s a lot more to be thankful for.  At least mas marami ang pubic hair mo kesa sa ari mo diba?

4.    “Paper’s not enough.”

My artistry cannot be handled by just journals and vandals on inanimate objects.

Well then, you’re a tattoo enthusiast but just haven’t found that out yet.  Magpatattoo ka a.  if magreklamo ang parents mo, sabhin mo “at least di ako nag-laslas”.  You have to explain your tendency for being self-destructive and find a way to make them realize the positivity in turning to art what could’ve been a dawdle with depressive media. 

Di karumihan ang tattoo lalo na kung nagpalagay ka ng kilay para maldita.

Each has a reason and I won’t argue with one about it.  I’d post an advice or two with a full rant blog pero di ako magpupumilit sa kung anumang tama para sa kung sinuman.  But on the four points herein, and mga kumong downer ay ang hopelessness, discouragement and desperation.  These are three cracks on the wall – might be the only ways to let light shine in.  it’s up to us now kung imamagnify natin ang light para magsindi ng fire of hope sa loob.  Mahirap na kung mahirap pero ika nga sa Legend of the Guardians – “When your wings are weak and your beaks are frozen, you’re halfway there.”

You’ll know you’re in the right path ‘coz you’re facing challenges and they’re not easy.

And hey, someone somewhere loves you.  Hold on if you feel like letting go.

"so if you wanna burn yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
and if you wanna cut yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
and if you wanna kill yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
call me up before your dead, we can make some plans instead
send me an IM, i'll be your friend!" – Kimya Dawson